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Porn Users are all Perverts–WRONG!

14 Dec 2017

Myth: Pornography Users Are All Perverts!

Fact:  Not true! The typical profile of someone battling with pornography is: they are bright, sensitive and spiritual. When you understand addiction and the obsessive/compulsive cycle that fuels it, this makes perfect sense. These individuals are not weak. They simply have great strengths that have become a weakness.

If you’re like virtually everyone who struggles with pornography use and other sexual behaviors, you’ve tried to overcome your addiction countless times, only to fall right back into your old cycle. Why does this happen over and over again? It’s not because you’re weak, flawed or a lost cause. In fact, you struggle because you have great strengths that have become a weakness. Everything you need to break free is already built into the very structure of your brain. You simply need to learn how to harness and redirect these natural abilities until your weakness becomes your greatest strength. Remember, your sexual addiction is a specific way of thinking and behaving that has developed over time through repetition. But sexual addiction does not define who you truly are—it’s not you!

We’re asked all the time—“What’s the typical profile of someone hooked on pornography?” After years of clinical experience with thousands of clients, here are the most common characteristics of someone struggling with pornography and other sexual addictions:

  1. They are very intelligent
  2. They are tender-hearted and sensitive
  3. The are spiritual

Does that surprise you? Once you fully understand the facts and underlying brain science behind pornography addiction, the reality that it hits the brightest, most sensitive and most spiritual individuals makes perfect sense.

To help you understand how so many good people get trapped in pornography and other sexual addiction behaviors, here’s a typical story. The addiction process described is very common. Can you see elements in the story that are similar to your own addiction history or that of someone you care about?

The College Student

Imagine an individual who excitedly enters college with a burning desire to gain valuable knowledge and skills. He wants to invest in himself and develop his talents and abilities. However, he soon discovers that he is surrounded by other bright, talented and ambitious people in a very competitive and rigorous environment. He’s not only in school, but he has a job in order to finance his schooling. He finds himself not just jogging, but sprinting in a rat race to just to keep up. Before long he is exhausted, but he doesn’t give up; he can’t slow down. He continues to work, study and sacrifice day-in and day-out, week after week, month after month, often for years.

He finds himself isolated and lonely because of a lack of time, social opportunities and energy. The intense daily competition leaves him feeling insecure and questioning his own worth, uniqueness, talents and abilities. He has little opportunity to really “play” and enjoy leisure time, or develop deeply meaningful social interactions and connection. He begins experiencing emotional burnout and mental and physical fatigue. He is a prime target and set-up for Internet pornography. He discovers that pornography is an easy, quick and cheap source of pleasure and escape. It is exciting and arousing—an extreme and intense amount of pleasure in a short period of time. Before long, cheap and easy sexuality becomes his preferred recreation. Empty but powerful pleasure replaces meaningful and personal fulfillment and satisfaction.

Within a short period of time the student develops an addiction. He begins accessing pornography more and more often. It starts interfering with his studies and his ability to focus and concentrate. He feels guilty about his behavior and tries to stop, but finds himself going back again and again. He tries to avoid even thinking about pornography and self-stimulation, and begins to fear these thoughts and his “out-of-control” behavior. The more he fights the thoughts, the more they force their way into his mind. Eventually, worn out by the struggle, he gives in and finds temporary relief, only to start the cycle all over again.

This bright, young, spiritual man finds himself shackled in chains, trapped in addiction. The more he tries to stop, the more difficult it becomes. The intense guilt, helplessness and discouragement become overwhelming.

If you are suffering under the burden of addiction, it’s not because you’re weak, a pervert or a freak—it’s because you are an intelligent, sensitive, spiritual person with great strengths that have been working against you. We will teach you how to turn your perceived weaknesses into the strengths that they truly are!

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