Spouse Support

IF YOU ARE THE SPOUSE OF AN ADDICT

When you discover that the man you love is caught up in pornography and sexual addiction, the natural, normal reaction is a deep and devastating sense of confusion, shock and betrayal.

When you are betrayed by one who has promised to honor, cherish, love and respect you, your whole world can come crashing down. Be assured that there is help and healing for you, a full recovery path for him, and real hope for a bright future together.

The Trauma of Betrayal:

When a spouse’s pornography use or other unwanted sexual behaviors are discovered, Betrayal Trauma is triggered as the brain tries to make sense of a traumatic experience that is outside the normal or natural boundaries of human experience. This trauma can trigger anger, confusion, anxiety, depression, chronic nightmares, flashbacks and more. We will help you recognize, understand and start down the path of resolving and healing this Betrayal Trauma.

His Addiction is NOT Your Fault:

It is common for a spouse to feel great confusion, shock and even wonder if she somehow has a degree of responsibility for her husband’s addiction. The clear and resounding answer to this question is “NO!” Just as a woman is not responsible for a husband’s drug, alcohol or gambling addiction, she is also not responsible for his pornography or sexual addiction. We will help you set clear, healthy boundaries that allow you to continue loving and supporting your husband, while making certain that the consistent daily work and responsibility for his recovery are squarely upon his shoulders.

Your Own Healing is Your First Priority:

In the event of a commercial airline jet losing cabin pressure, passengers are instructed to secure their own oxygen masks first before attempting to assist others. Your first priority is to be aware of and attend to your own healing and well being. The good news is you absolutely can heal and be restored to peace of mind, heart, body and spirit. In the Renaissance program we help you progress on your own personal path of healing, which includes the support of our professional staff, and other women who are facing challenges similar to yours.

Your Relationship Can Be Better Than Ever:

We can tell you by long experience that there is every hope and expectation for your husband’s full recovery, and the complete healing and restoration of your relationship. It will take time, patience and consistent effort, but it is entirely possible. There are many couples that bear witness to the fact that while it was difficult, their recovery experience created a richness of experience, a depth of maturity and wisdom, and a bond that cannot be broken. Above all, the real miracle is the knowledge that a positive outcome does not depend solely on you. Through the love, grace, tender mercies and atonement of Jesus Christ, wounds can be healed, broken hearts mended, forgiveness felt and shattered trust restored.

Recovery From Pornography
and Sexual Addiction Is Possible

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